Co-parenting a child with autism is hard enough when both parents are on the same page. When your ex is high-conflict, every choice (the diagnosis, therapy, school services, even which chicken nuggets are in the freezer) can turn into a fight. And your child feels all of it.
Melissa Berger, a coach for parents of autistic kids and the mom of a daughter diagnosed at 16, joins us to discuss how to keep your child at the center when you and your ex can't agree on much. Melissa shares simple steps you can use this week for decisions, IEP and 504 meetings, moves between two homes, and keeping your child out of the conflict.
If you're drafting a parenting plan, heading into a school meeting, or trying to understand why your child falls apart after every exchange, this talk will give you clarity and a plan.
WHAT YOU'LL LEARN:
✅ What to do first when parents disagree about a diagnosis
✅ Why one main decision maker keeps care focused on your child
✅ A parenting plan idea that cuts fights: defer to a named specialist
✅ How to handle IEP and 504 meetings when you and your ex are in conflict
✅ Why a calm weekly behavior summary beats blame
✅ What a social story is, and how it makes each switch between homes feel safer
✅ Why the same foods, bedding, and bedtimes at both homes matter so much
✅ How masking can look like "fine" until your child melts down at home
✅ Red flags that it may be time for a guardian ad litem or custody evaluator
✅ Melissa's four ways to protect autistic kids in high-conflict families
ABOUT MELISSA BERGER
Melissa Berger is a certified professional coach (CPCC, Co-Active Training Institute) who helps parents of autistic kids make big decisions with confidence. Her own daughter was diagnosed with autism at 16. Melissa also brings a child's-eye view of divorce: her parents split when she was 12, and she grew up moving between two very different households. Before coaching, she spent 30 years in executive leadership with Whole Foods Market. Her philosophy is simple: parents of autistic kids don't need more noise. They need clarity, confidence, and calm.
🌐 CONNECT WITH MELISSA BERGER
Website: https://www.melissakberger.com
📖 RESOURCES MENTIONED
James Hunt, Stories About Autism (Instagram: @storiesaboutautism) and his memoir, Love Needs No Words
💙 BEEN THERE GOT OUT RESOURCES
Free 30-minute discovery call: https://beentheregotout.com
Strategic Communication Course: https://programs.beentheregotout.com/strategic-communication
Instagram: @been_there_got_out
Lisa Johnson and Chris Barry are high-conflict divorce, custody, and co-parenting strategists. If your ex makes co-parenting your special needs child feel impossible, you don't have to figure it out alone.
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